You’ll think ‘Of course my child’s success is mine’. And what about his failure? You’ll promptly reply ‘Yes, they too are mine’. There is nothing wrong if the parent feels proud of his child’s success and takes responsibility to help his child improvise incase he fails. But what happens when parents cross this line and start relating their child’s achievements or downfalls as their own. Are you one of those?
Do you consider your child your status symbol?: When your child doesn’t perform in front of guests or doesn’t bag prizes, do you feel embarrassed or ashamed? You may be a CEO of your company or a successful entrepreneur, remember your child is yet to discover his identity. He is yet to learn from his mistakes, yet to live his life.
Are you in competition with other parents?: Swimming classes at the club, guitar classes at home, dance classes at the academy, weekend classes of ‘How to improve your Maths’. Are you trying to create a superkid so that you can boast to be a supermom?
Are you trying to fulfill your dreams through your child?: Every parent has dreams for his child. And while dreaming, they want their child to have all that they don’t have, achieve what they couldn’t. Let your child weave his own dreams and not get crushed under your pressure.
Are you living solely for your child?: Parents sometimes start thinking, doing and living only for their child and stop living their own life. Too much of involvement has an adverse effect on child’s growth and he just can’t step out of his parent’s shadow.
Is all this causing irreparable damage?: Yes, it is. You are unknowingly killing your child’s natural abilities, depriving him to come out with his true colours, taking away from him his golden childhood, marring his confidence and independence. Accept the fact that your child is the most beautiful and important part of your life but certainly not your whole life.